Women's Awareness Blog











{December 10, 2009}   There is not enough darkness in the world for one small candle……

I remember the first time I was molested. I was five. I still remember that day like it was yesterday. The man who molested me was one of my father’s friends. The man was drunk. The next time I was molested, it was attempted rape. I was nine. It was my friend’s brothers and some of their cousins. The next couple of times I was molested, I was a young teenager. Those time were again my father’s business friends, who had too much to drink. I was date-raped when I was 19. I had too much to drink and had asked my girlfriend’s boyfriend to give me a ride to my house. I woke up in the morning and started screaming when I looked over and saw my friend’s boyfriend laying naked in my bed; I was naked too but remember nothing about how I got that way or how the man got there. He kept saying “I thought you knew.” I think guys like to think the comotose drunk female body that they are having sex with is really conscious. My daughter, she wasn’t raped, at least that is what I was told by the medical examiner. My daughter was drugged with the date-rape drug, Ghb. She knew her assilants. She didn’t know they would drug her to death. They poisoned her with Ghb. I see her boyfriend’s name, Abstract Rude, on the Internet and I feel sick because the police did not press charges against him or his friends who were responsible for her death. I didn’t go to the media and say hey those were the guys that rapper, Abstract Rude, and his band. One of them put Ghb in my daughter’s drink and she died. I thought I couldn’t say anything because the police were investigating. But, there was no real investigation. It was a mockery of justice. What I want you to remember is that the people who rape and put date-rape drugs in your drinks are usually the really nice people you know: your friends, your boyfriend, your relatives, people your husband or dad or brother knows. They are everywhere. They are prdeators. It is hard to be invisible. It is also amazing how innocent it can all start out to be, and then there you are victimized. All the times I was molested by my father’s friends I never told anyone.  I kept it a seccret. When my daughter was drugged to death, I stayed silent hoping the police would prosecute the guilty. They didn’t. No one has to keep silent anymore. I am here, and there are hundreds of woman like me who want to listen, who want to be there for you, who want to help heal your pain. Don’t be alone in your pain. Speak up! The more who raise their voices there will be no more secrets to hide. There is not enough darkness for one candle: http://www.pbase.com/selvin/image/29142391

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